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[08 Oct 2004|03:00pm]
new journal


silly isn't it?
1 listening ear[s] help along the way

[30 Sep 2004|08:24pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]

damn, i really wished i had wrote down the answers for my english homework. now i am going to fail for sure.math and relgion tests were taken today so we'll see how that goes.

things have been resolved with jason. my week has gotten alot better. many compliments seem to have been directed to me on my physical appearence. alot from people who's name i don't know. how crazy is that?

in mass i realized how very few sophmores i know. many i didn't even know they existed...people at lunch table sometimes mention sophmores and i rarely know who they are. i feel kind of bad about that.

meh, i wish i had better people skills.

on that note, the sophmores need to get a life, or a large majority of them. i said "fuck" really loudly in english and such. i didn't mean to say that outloud. but the thing that gets me is that people were talking about it like it was the biggest event of the week...i mean..c'mon...get a life kiddeies. like you don't go around doing it. one girl behind me in the concesion stand mentioned my name and started talking about it to some girls i didn't have a clue to who they were. i let her know i was there to embrass her.

8:35 and i am already tired? damn...

You are purple. What a romantic person you are.
You're sentimental and forward-looking (those
are opposites.). You're a sophisticated and
refined--with a refind taste for chocolates and
wine (yum...). Tempermental and moody, you let
people know when you're angry. But other
times, you just sit and sulk. Alone. When
around people, you're a generous person, with
insatiable needs. You're a starving artist,
basically. You're enjoy getting into debates
over politics and religion with people of the
same intelligence of you. But you know they
can never convince you otherwise, you stubborn
person, you. As a unique person you are (not
to mention just a tad bit eccentric...), you're
well-liked by either a few people, or too many

What color are you? (Amazingly detailed & accurate--with pics!)
brought to you by Quizilla

help along the way

[18 Sep 2004|12:13pm]
You are French
You are a Parisian.

What's your Inner European?
brought to you by Quizilla

sky captain is amusing, it's hollywood's version of Big O.

anyone care to see vanity fair with me this weekend?
help along the way

[17 Sep 2004|06:37am]
Your LJ Prison by redfrog021
Favorite Deadly Sin
You are convicted ofHolding a Children's Site Hostage for Server Space, you jerk!
And sentenced to10 years
Abusive redneck guardfireyactress
Easy to bribe guardleonsyn
Wants to make you their bitchgringageek
Drops soap in the shower on purposedreamwithnohope
Works in the laundry and smells people's undiesbuymeimfluffy
Comes to see you for 'conjugal visits'_lord_abortion_
Quiz created with MemeGen!
2 listening ear[s]s help along the way

i make myself sick [12 Sep 2004|05:04pm]
[ mood | bored ]

i have temporarily moved downstairs into the extra bedroom. this is through my own fault, and i really am not too upset about it. i'll be upstairs again soon enough.
this is partly b/c i put RO on the computer down here. my laptop seems to have a virus of some sort in it, even though i ran it through the virus scanner.

which sucks because i realllyyy wanted to upload this picture on to deviant. it's very much like digi charat, but in my opinion is more special.

so everyone keeps going on about this buisness with gabby. i didn't even know about it until amanda started to tell me. made me realize how i seem to be a fringe friend. not someone you see often, just say hello to and don't diss to your friends about. i seem to be like that with alot of people, though i wish i could be closer.

i had so much fun friday night with jacob, sam, and jackie. i'm glad they got to meet jacob. i love doing stuff on the weekends, unless i am doing RO, really into a picture(which hasn't happened much lately) i can't stand to be at home. so now to entertain myself i'm writing a lj entry. how pathetic is that?

so how was the show on saturday everyone? i had to babysit, so i didn't go. i doubt i could have gotten a ride anyhow. i need to finish doing my english homework..one more try to see if RO's server is up, then i'll work on it.

anyone know how to change your lj name?

help along the way

[08 Sep 2004|10:52pm]
Your LJ life. by deew_sih
You marry:loserindistress
You hate:snowhite666
You love:fireyactress
Hates you:dreamwithnohope
Loves you:mirokufarwind
Kills you:dreamsofscarlet
Brings you back to life:fallinleaves
Kills you again:leonsyn
Cries at your funeral:buymeimfluffy
Laughs at your funeral:gringageek
Kills themself over you:madhero
Quiz created with MemeGen!
7 listening ear[s]s help along the way

[26 Aug 2004|09:05pm]
well i can't seem to decide if i want to keep this livejournal or not

i guess the main reason why i would keep it is that i like to read some people's journals. mostly those i don't get to talk to very much, or those i like but find difficult to talk to.

on the other hand most of the time i'm too worried about saying anything too personal, or just don't give a crap. i don't like having this many buddies on my friend's list. i know it's not alot at all, but it still makes me nervous.

i'm having another mood swing it seems like. right now i am so sure that i must be the most annoying person in existence and wonder how people put up with me. ugh i sound like i was a year ago. i keep comparing myself to other people and can't help but think they are so much better then me.it's wrong to think like this, but knowing that doesn't seem to help me. this should probably pass soon.

sorry, i guess i just need to whine. i don't know why i've felt like this, but i do. i don't know why i care if people like me or not, or respect me but i do. a few weeks ago i couldn't have given less of a damn, but now something has changed. i don't know.

at least i shall see jacob tomorrow. i need him and samatha to meet, they would be such great friends. i wish i could communicate better to people.
2 listening ear[s]s help along the way

[19 Aug 2004|09:32pm]
help along the way

[19 Aug 2004|06:03am]
for the first time i ate a cinnamon roll for breakfast, during the school year on a weekday. i'm not used to feeling so full. at least now i won't have to buy a lunch.

i set my clock for five thiry today and i ended up waking before that. wonder why i even bother.

at least now i shall be able to see the whole mass clearly, since i've actually been wearing my contacts. mr. lynch is going to check my uniform again at 6:45. nobody has said anything about my socks, guess those are fine.

art club is going to be so great, with all the people in it at least.
help along the way

[15 Aug 2004|06:54pm]
[ mood | amused ]

well that's what happens when i get side tracked.

i am amused greatly. well there's no point in caring about her and her damn assumptions. i love everyone else.

rudy hopefully liked that book i gave him. he's so nice. kathy and i got closer, and i talked rudy's brother's ear off. poor guy.

i like myself now.

i miss jason,jacob,kyle, and so many other people. and i don't care about so many other people anymore.

but this has brought a very frightening point. my dad is rubbing off too much on me. i don't wish to be like him when it comes to disscussions. but i would like to be like him when things get tough. i doubt that will come to pass though.

somethings i need to work on but i think i am heading in the right direction.

oh i might still get to go vist my uncle and aunt for thanksgiving. i might be going to germany this spring.

help along the way

[12 Aug 2004|05:14pm]
fuck fuck fuckers fuck

i'm so jealous. it's just not fair. am i just not good enough? why the hell is jessica so sucessful? why is everyone so sucessful and i who am as just as good am unnoticed? i want some god damn reconginition. i want to be succesful like jessica. damn my situation. if i lived with her, would i be as succesful?
3 listening ear[s]s help along the way

[07 Aug 2004|02:14pm]
my first day back was alot better then i expected. alot better.

the only down things about it were, i don't have any classes or lunch with jason, gina, and some other people. i don't care much right now for my english or my math teacher, but my opinion could change of course.

i think this year i'll go talk to those two boys. the younger i remember his name is eric, and he's a sophmore too. i remember how he and his older brother were the only people who liked me at that camp. i'm going to see if they remember me.

i hope i don't roll over and become a lazy fuck like i did last year. i've already got my supplies now.
i don't know how PE class will go. alot of girls who i'd rather not be in the same room with are in there. thank god for courtney and raechel.

oh and i still have a very nice lunch group. kelli and courtney are there. amanda is there, and another who i've just met named morgan is there. i really like her. i feel stupid for being immature and not talking to meagan. i ought to apoligize for my rudeness.

courtney has signed up for ragnorok, let the fun begin! i'm already starting to draw my characters. which makes me remember that i need to finish that painting of the female and the snake.

How evil are you?

i think i might leave lj soon.
5 listening ear[s]s help along the way

[29 Jul 2004|12:12am]
[ mood | cheerful ]

well i've had a very lovely birthday

i'm happy with the nice responses i got from everyone on the picture. someone faved it. that made me even more happy.

a artist i greatly admire and who at times i read her lj seems to have bothered me tonight. normally i agree with her wholeheartdly on her opinions regarding fandom. but at times it seems she is quite insensitive. perhaps she's had bad-experience with the fans. even so when she completly and totally blows off another artist who would like to befriend her, i find that a tad bit out of line. she actually was making fun of the poor girl "you think your little plan would work and i'd become your friend??"

sounds down right mean. appreantly the poor girl is a well respected artist in her own right. i can understand when it's some snot nosed pre-teen that's just pestering you and bombarding you with emails containing bad english. but when someone who is really and genuiely going out of there way, then you should appreciate it! that's one of the good things about posting your work online. when you get fans who really show an interest in your work!! yours! of all the people they choose YOU!!

so don't be snot-nosed about it. no matter how good you are.

help along the way

[27 Jul 2004|01:08pm]
i'm so bored here.

i thought this be a time for happiness. i just want to leave this house, i don't care anymore if that means disobdiement.
help along the way

[23 Jul 2004|08:48pm]
[ mood | disappointed ]

today was good even though i never left the house.

i found out that kelly lives very close to my grandmother ^-^, that's so awesome.

it looks like i will in fact be starting driver's ed, next week.
mostly today though i worked on a picture who i have high hopes for. i think i will post it on deviant when i finish it.

i'm dissapointed by this film "life is beautiful" i really wish the A&E hadn't dubbed it....>_< i would have glady chosen subtitles any day. now i can't decide whether to watch it or not.

oh dear.

must get a date for kelli to come model...

7 listening ear[s]s help along the way

[22 Jul 2004|12:19pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

less then a week until my birthday, oh boy.
mom's been asking me what i want to for my birthday, i have no idea ^^;

i think dad is the one who keeps preventing me from doing driver's ed. i don't think i'll get my license until next summer.

other then that...don't think there is anything else worth saying.

help along the way

[19 Jul 2004|10:54am]
[ mood | anxious ]

well it looks like i am back. sure that will matter to everyone. not sure if i even still want to me on lj it's gotten so.."blah"

i had a most wonderful time at the beach. damn i miss it already. dewey has altziemers.(i don't have dictinary on me)i remember the last time i met him and he was quizing me on my world war two knowledge. his wife is still incredibly nice, so i made a picture for her in watercolor. it's not that great, but i still wish i had a copy of it.

going to fairhope, this tiny norman rockwell town was alot of fun. they had an art gallery every block it seems. several of the astract art pieces were nice, but i found this portrait for sale, that was very much below my skill level. perhaps i am just getting ahead of myself, but if i ever went to an anime convention i might consider selling artwork. i think it might be just around that time of ...but who am i kidding. many other artists are selling their work and are above my level. i'd just look like a jerk.

and continuing on the subject of art and anime, i've been thinking of doing a realistic portrait of a certain anime character. if i follow through with this i need KELLI BONIN TO MODEL FOR ME!!! well i just need your face, it's perfect for the picture!!! *sounds pyschotic*

i've gotten such a pretty skirt in gulf shores, but i'm afraid to wear it out in public..it looks something like a hippy would wear, or a under skirt of mideval dress and it goes down to my feet. it's so pretty though....

i should get back to learning my math for tonight...argh..need to stop being such a motherfucking bum.

i seriously need to meet jessica sometime. gads i love that girl.

why is it that everyone has such cool results, and i get these ;_;?

What in a cemetery are you? by FictionalVixen.

What Sort of Hat Are You? I am a Pointy Princess Hat.I am a Pointy Princess Hat.

I am an innocent, and believe that everything should be provided for me. I am rather self-conscious, and rarely let my hair down, except perhaps for a handsome prince or beautiful princess. What Sort of Hat Are You?

I'm a Moonflower. I only bloom at night and I'm pollinated by moths. Kinky, huh? This flower means "I dream of love" and I do.
What bloom are you? by Polly_Snodgrass

You're The Guns of August!

by Barbara Tuchman

Though you're interested in war, what you really want to know is what
causes war. You're out to expose imperialism, militarism, and nationalism for what they
really are. Nevertheless, you're always living in the past and have a hard time dealing
with what's going on today. You're also far more focused on Europe than anywhere else in
the world. A fitting motto for you might be "Guns do kill, but so can

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

6 listening ear[s]s help along the way

[07 Jul 2004|11:16pm]
[ mood | cranky ]


it's offical. amanda and cameron were seperated at birth. and listening to them talk was quite an experience.

talked to jessica, hopefully i was of help to her. she's really great to talk to.

helped jacob get some more gifts for dad. i can't wait for gulf shores it'll be great.

i've come to the conclusion that someone has to have a purpose in order to live, unless they are stupid.

random thoughts, nothing to wonderful. only two more days till beaches.

i can't tell whether i like some people or am just annoyed by them. and i finally got the last book of a series. thankfully.

going to work a bit in watercolor hope the paper doesn't buckle.

help along the way

[07 Jul 2004|11:18am]
[ mood | bored ]

waiting for jacob's call to go help him shop for dad. need to wash more clothes and do the dishes. i guess i'll just call him.

i might move to france someday, not sure. i look practically like a normandy girl according to people who are familiar with france...weird..

it's decided that i shall draw a picture of sean connery as james bond for dad. he's got to love it.

A Playful Kiss
A Playful Kiss

What kind of *+*Amore*+* Do you Desire?
brought to you by Quizilla

find your element
at mutedfaith.com.

i always wanted to be...

You are a Cajun!

Whats your inner American?
brought to you by Quizilla

i've got to do something with darby and kyle before the end of summer.
help along the way

[07 Jul 2004|01:11am]
so today was pretty good. had a very nice time with jason at the movies. started working and doodling some. i've come up with this sketch for ryan that he's been asking for since near the begining of school @_@.
i'm going to have to show jacob a sketch i did that's inspired by him ,and all of a suddely i want to paint it in pastel. maybe i'll do it on a whim. i love how my other picture i coming out.

i need to decide if i am going to draw a picture of sean connery as james bond for dad's birthday. i just can't decide. i guess i'll ask mom who's his favorite so he won't be suspicious.

i seem to have developed my own style by accident. how amusing. even more so is how the time of the month came. thank god it wasn't during the trip like i had feared.must have those damn pills close by.

once i get the sketchbook i need to start making plan's for dominique's picture.

i took a look at some of my old books from when i was till around 10. those nancy drew illustrations are so awful, and those illustrated classics series are pretty bad as well. but there's this mother gooose nursey rhyme book that's got some really nice illustrations in it. love the effects for watercolor, and how there's a slightly more not neccasrily dark but less barney like illustrations. not exactely like arthur rackham's illustrations but somewhat. gods i kill to get a book illustrated by him.

sometimes i think on deviant jessica is the only one who appreaciates my work. but i really shouldn't complain, i haven't updated in over a month.
help along the way

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